Currently under construction, the LHC is scheduled to begin operation in September 2008.

The LHC is expected to become the world's largest and highest energy penile accelerator ever assembled. Expected to penetrate new areas, the LHC will produce high speed, head-on collisions between beams of yonic and phallic particles. 

When switched on, it is hoped that colliding the hard-on will have contact on the elusive Higg's Bosom (hoping their mass will be large) — often dubbed the 'Oh God! Part-icle' — the observation of which could confirm the 'missing contacts' for my human intercourse, and explain how other elementary parts acquire properties such as [m]ass, attraction, hotness, chemistry, etc.

Safety Concerns:

Black Holes: Should any Black Holes or odoriferous radiation discharged thereof be encountered during operation, I plan to simply ignore its presence and continue on with the matter at hand, colliding my hard-on.

Strange Matter:
Hey, I'll try anything once.

While I am very complimented by your interest in my love life,
maybe you were looking for the Large HaDRon Collider,
instead of my Large Hard-On Collider home page.

It's a Sopranos' worthy malapropism (A ludicrous misuse of a word that sounds like the one intended)

While it's funny when a fat NJ criminal doesn't know any better,
it's HILARIOUS when a serious scientist or journal (or even the New York Times) uses the incorrect, dirty, wrong word!

03/29/08 New York Times prints "Large Hardon Collider"!
Click HERE to see the error and uncorrected Google Cache.

04/02/08 Boing Boing features Large Hardon Collider Home Page

I couldn't believe this domain wasn't already taken!

In fact, I'd be happy to sell to your porn empire for the inevitable gay porno movie of the same name!


Email: MrOogly (at) gmail . com
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